|
|
||
|
|
Dear Valerie By Valerie Markva Dear Valerie; Another Christmas and New Year's brings feelings of doubt & self-pity to my mind. Each year I tell myself I'm going to lose weight, be a more understanding person, the list goes on. There's all these things I want to change about myself, but I know I'll let myself down and wind up feeling depressed. How can I stop this? It's a no-win situation. Thanks, J.P. Dear J.P: It sounds like you're setting some pretty high standards, expecting to reach them quickly. The impulse is to give up before you've had a chance to meet your own expectations. Try to avoid looking at the big picture, as this leads to becoming overwhelmed. Instead, try setting daily goals, focus on small achievements, and reward yourself for the progress that you make. Be firm, but also kind to yourself and you will meet with success. Valerie UPON A GLIMPSE OF PERFECTION In ancient Greece and Hindu India, it was believed that perfection, in its highest & purest form, existed in a separate realm - a world of spirituality far beyond the concept of 'human excellence.' For human beings, the link to this 'other world' was through having the ability to express imagination & ideas. A melody, conceived in this 'world of perfection', perhaps whispered to the composer upon waking and haunted him until he wrote a grand piece of music. Thus, what is received from the land of perfection, is not the gift of perfection itself; rather, it's wondrous extension, success within the context of human limitation. Although we are not perfect, we are able to achieve success despite human constraint. The ancients believed that as a direct result of a unique & mysterious process, which melds together failure and success, lies the capacity to gain satisfaction from achievement. Without failure, there can be no sense of satisfaction. Without an idea of perfection, it cannot be incorporated into the shape of our lives. Limited human success, in comparison to an imagined perfection, brings the sense that one is imperfect and a tendency for failure (loss of self-worth and confidence). Because of human limitation, we are unable to achieve perfection. Nothing is ever imagined it would be and because of this it is useless to try & live up to our imaginations. We should listen to the voice of imagination, to it's visions and poetry, without feeling inferior, knowing that we have the ability to re-create it's magic, in our own very human ways. An essential step in meeting with the success that imagination will offer life is to first confront failure. We are baffled by the core of failure, because it's mystery tells us that we must learn to fail before we can succeed. Failure may come to visit because our lives haven't turned out as we have imagined. We are then comparing the imperfection in reality to a spiritual sense of perfection. A good way to understand failure is to discover it's humbling nature. When we are allowed to be human, to be comfortably inferior - "I am not the smartest person, I am not the richest, most beautiful person" we are beginning to recognize our equality as humans in the sense that we are understanding a greater need that has nothing to do with wealthy, beauty and power. It is about having the capacity to look beyond the superficial fabric of life, with open eyes & ears, to understand that the core of life encourages us to embrace defeat & failure, to be brave throughout poverty and misfortune. The shape of life can take hold as we begin to know ourselves and love the purpose that we have been given. It's important to remember that with each trial comes the blessing of success. Despite what illusions we have about what we see in other people and want for ourselves, no matter how we define the word 'perfect', success will never match perfection. Be at peace with the song that your own heart sings, and the talents that you, as individuals, have been given. Success is as the wind, moving gracefully in silent moments, unexpectedly unfurled, a hint of that distant world of perfection. Mind & Wind There are only certain things You can measure - Half empty or half full Only so much can be counted - like opposite & equal Dreams unencumbered by this density, Dreams like ones I've lived Inside your head Are neither half empty or half full They exist like breath of breeze; The wind in your hair, that stirs the trees I've lived these Dreams inside your head And kissed them, as they passed by my lips Kissed them like bittersweet fortunes And memories of pleasure & pain That echo, Mind & Wind *come and join my 'poet house' - interested? E-mail me for info.
If you have an everyday 'bother' or 'trouble' you would like to share with Valerie, whatever your age or problem, write or e-mail her at: Tavia7@webtv.net or care of Review Magazine, 318 S. Hamilton St., Saginaw, MI 48602
|
|
|
|
Enable frames | |
|
home | out/about | events | personal | store | classified | real estate | forums | archives | contact |
||
